Had been awhile that i didn't blog already. Few things had happened recently which makes me feel very vexed and fraustrated...

Had went to grandma's tomb sweeping on 5 April [sunday]. Really missed her alot... Had talk alot to her... Telling her things that had happened recently and some of my problems... Hope she would blessed me in whatever i do...

Yan has finally graduate from RP on 8 April [Wed]. Had attended to her graduation with Hui... Was happy for her too and also Wang, my godbro, who is the same school as yan... It's like finally they have grown up... It also makes me feel like going back to school again... hehe... Anyway... I feel happy and proud of them...

Had went to O bar with yiling to celebrate her birthday on Friday night [10 April]. I've met Debbie, Shi Jie and Marie there as Debbie was also celebrating her bdae there too. What a coincident right? The world was just too small... hehe... Anyway I had enjoy that night no matter is it drinking or dancing. I hope Yiling doesn't gets angry cos i end up kept joining Shi Jie and Marie at the dance floor. And of cos, i ended up being send home by Shi Jie and his friend, Yun Xiang. Though it quite fun to go double O or O bar, but i still prefer a live band where it's not too noisy place to drink cos i just want to relax and enjoy drinking. haha...

After a few days of leave, when i return back to work at turf club, was like damn shit lor. Saw the irritating executive over there. It was like everytime i saw her, there won't be any good thing happen. so unlucky de...

was wondering when to quit the job at turf club. my schedule now was so pack and full that i don't even have to the time spare to take a very good rest. thought that i would have a good rest during public holiday but end up i've still got to give tuition. oh man... mama wants me to quit that job too as she wants me to go back to school more often so that i could check with the school about IR progress and practice on my skills too. But now, I'm headache with when should i quit and how should i tell my supervisor.

I wonder... if i were to quit, will there be anyone over there miss me? hehe... three months, though it's neither long nor it's short too. I really had communicate and see many different types of gamblers. I had even make friends with some of them too... there's also a number of caring uncles there who always buys me drinks and food. really appreciate it and feel very grateful too... there's also this cleaner who i called her as my lover. really feels great to know her... guess there's always hello and then goodbye... think i will miss them alot after i've quit.

Anyway... Last sat have a small quarrel with Vincent about i went clubbing and there's one guy hugging me when we are dancing. I just don't get why he has to be so angry and jealous about it. cos i think it's just ridiculous that he's so jealous as he has already got a girlfriend.

I really don't understand what does he want. I can't figure out what is he thinking of. I admit that i really fall for him but i'm just way too scare that i may fall really deep. i just don't want to gt hurt anymore. i was so sad and really can't help it. my heart just sank out of no where after drinking on Friday night. I'm scare of losing him now and i really miss him. But i just can't help avoiding him somehow. i start to wonder whether to listen to his phone calls when he called [but i'm still waiting for him to call].

Now... I really don't know what i want. yan's grad that day, he took me out to play. was really happy that day but i was wondering, we still got how many happy moments together? I don't want to break others relationship but he's just too good to me that i can't help falling for him...

Argh... what am i suppose to do now?